Trust

Lately I have been dwelling in the past and in what could have been. Really this isn't a good thing because it leads me to almost doubt my decisions. While sometimes it is good to doubt some decisions, I know that these ones were right and correct.

I can't stop thinking though.

Sometimes it is almost easier to live in the past and what you wish were now instead of the present. I like day dreaming and thinking of what would be wonderful. Right now I would be watching a movie and cuddling. I would be enveloped in love, and warmth, and peace. I would know that everything is perfect and that I couldn't be more happier. Just a simple look and phrase would warm my heart. Everything that I have been taught to wish for my whole life would no longer be a wish but a reality. Never again would I have to be alone. I would always have that person who knows me best with me. Everything is perfect and I feel for a split second like my life is perfect.

I can't turn back on my decisions and that is why thinking about the "what could have been" is dangerous. It makes me forget why I chose what I did and how I felt that I needed to make those choices. Life is never perfect and things don't turn out the way we think they should. We don't know all.

Christmas is just around the corner and this year I think that I see it more geared toward Christ then I have ever before. I am so thankful for our Heavenly Father and for Jesus Christ. I know that even though I now don't know where my life is going or what is in store for me they do. As long as I keep my trust in them I can never be lead astray. Every time I start to think of the "what if" I just need to remember that this is the right path and that I shouldn't doubt the promptings that I had.

They won't lead me astray.